1. Rosey took her sewing kit on a train to repair a rip in her skirt during the journey. When the handsome young man sitting alongside stood up to leave he found Rosey had accidentally sewn her skirt to his jacket!
2. Whilst queuing in Starbucks, Rosey mentioned James, a prospective new boyfriend. “He told me he’s a barrister,” she said proudly. Rosey’s mouth dropped open when James the barista served our coffee!
3. Once in church, she asked me if sanctified wine was another name for Sancerre! I was worried in case whilst receiving communion she’d ask if they had any Chardonnay. Fortunately, she didn’t.
4. She told me once that she tiptoes past her medicine cabinet to avoid waking up her sleeping pills.
5. She was worried she had diseased feet. “Look, brown spots”. I pointed out they formed a pattern just like the circular cutouts on the Crocs she wore.
“Suntan?” asked she.
“Yep” said I.
6. You are often unsure if she’s joking or being serious like when she said that nine out of ten injections are given in vain.
7. I saw Rosey in the mall yesterday. She was returning some jeans to for a refund because they had holes in them. She showed me.
“Rosey”I said, “they are distressed jeans, they are meant to…..’‘
“They are distressed?’ she interrupted. “What about me?”
“You must be mortified” I quipped.
“Mortified? I’m not dead!”
I received one her looks that make me feel like I’m the ditsy one!
8. The other day she said ducks wake up at the quack of dawn. Then she said “What do you call a cat that’s swallowed a duck? A fat-duck-filled pus!”
“I think you mean a ‘duck-filled fatty-pus,” I said. She didn’t understand.
9. Rosey saw a helium-filled balloon straining skyward, and it made her think. She’d just posted a fragile package, and if she could have wrapped it with helium-filled bubble wrap it may have weighed less! I said if she invented a helium bra, she would probably weigh less too!
10. She once said “Every day is a gift. That’s why it’s called the present”.
This time last year I introduced you Mark Xavier. To say hello again click HERE