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Arthur had his head buried in a newspaper as he struggled to complete the crossword puzzle, “just one word to go”, he said as he scratched his head, “it’s another word for antique, I’ve got a C, and an E and an R”, “how about Eric”, said Ted, “he’s getting on a bit, so is Cedric and as for Cyril, Y not?”; Arthur looked doubtful, “it’s supposed to be a synonym, not a synoname” he said!
“My husband’s getting on a bit too”, said Babs, “you know how you work out the age of a felled tree by its number of rings, well I know Bob’s age by counting his wrinkles, hey Len, look this way, see if I can work out how old you are – blimey, just look at you, you’re well past retirement age!” – “OY”, yelled Landlord Len, “I’ll have no ageist talk in my pub!”
“I won’t be coming here on Friday”, said Pete, “there’s gonna be a hen party, and you know how raucous they can get”, “I doubt it’ll be that raucous”, piped up Pete, “it’s dear ‘ole Martha, from the old folks home and she’s getting hitched to a bloke twenty years her junior, I reckon he’s more interested in her bottomless pit than their bouts of passion”; “well we’re all going to be here!” shouted Sally from the knitting circle waving her half-made scarf in the air like a festive flag!
“Talking of ancient things, Len excepted”, said Ted, “I was carrying my old grandfather clock from my truck to the antique shop the other day, and I accidentally bumped into someone, I naturally apologised, but he looked me in the eye and said I should get myself a wristwatch like everybody else”.
“I was clearing out my loft yesterday”, said Bob, “I found all sorts of relics, a Hoover that was still gathering dust and lots of old medicines, anyone would think it was a drug attic, then I came across the pencil case I had when I went to school!”; “did you know that Shakespeare used a pencil to write Hamlet, 2B or not 2B?” quipped Colin – his joke went down like a lead balloon!
“I’ve got it”, shouted a triumphant Arthur, “my missing word, it’s ceril… oh, that’s not a word and certainly nothing to with antiques, let’s try derelict … no, it sounds right but there are three too many letters, I give up!
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Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories. This week’s word is Relic.
This is a classic, a keeper, a relic!
I could have told him the answer 😂😂😂
Nice one Keith, a rousing party to be had at Martha’s wedding to be sure…and I like the thread of the crossword puzzle!
Fun as always Keith
”derelict “ …. 😂😂😂
There are days when I feel like a derelict relic. Enjoyed this one!
Nice one: “did you know that Shakespeare used a pencil to write Hamlet, 2B or not 2B?” 🙂
Heeheehee! I hope they have fun at the hen party. Maybe it should be held at the Baaamy Inn.
Too funny… I wonder whether when I play Scrabble tomorrow I can use ‘relic’ then add ‘de’ and ‘t’?😉
“it’s supposed to be a synonym, not a synoname”
“and lots of old medicines, anyone would think it was a drug attic”
These lines had me laughing. Fantastic as ever, Keith!
fave punnation* of the week: “...a Hoover that was still gathering dust and lots of old medicines, anyone would think it was a drug attic”.
*not a ‘real’ word
fun Six as always
My favorites were “a Hoover that was…” and “Shakespeare used a pencil…”
I never leave here without a smile on my face, Keith!
Delightful assortment of puns.