Six more!

Keith's Ramblings

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Now and again they have a comedy night at The Baaamy Inn when the locals have a go at amusing their fellow imbibers by telling jokes with varying degrees of success, in fact they had one last night.

Farmer Fred was first to grab the microphone and said, ‘I know how to win a farm ladies heart … attract her’, which was greeted with stunned silence until Arthur yelled, ‘I got it, a tractor’ causing a gaggle of groans, then in a second effort to gain a laugh Fred said he’d watched a movie about farm life but it was a too grainy and the plot was corny – then he gave up!

Village copper PC Peacock was next, he usually gets a giggle or two especially from dodgy-deaing Dave who’s keen to keep him side, and he said that he saw a lady driving a car while knitting the other day and when he shouted ‘pull over’, she said ‘no, it’s a scarf!’

The ladies from the knitting circle were in stitches over that, so they thought they’d have a go; ‘a cat swallowed a ball of wool and had mittens!’ said Kate; ‘a nun became addicted to knitting’  said Nora, ‘the needles were habit forming!’.

Then it was back to the  farmers again, and Colin’s usual high speed rendition of one-liners; ‘a pig was in pain so I gave it some oinkment, a cow jumped over a barbed wire fence, it was an udder disaster, my corn was listening to me, it was all ears …….

‘Time ladies and gentlemen please’ yelled Landlord Len, ‘ten to eleven’ joked Gladys, ‘ I know, which is you need to finish your drink my dear, you must ‘ave an ‘ome to go to’; ‘Bill has’, she replied, ‘he’s got two gnomes on his front lawn, but why don’t you let all have one for the road?’, then as Len glanced at PC Peacock who was fast asleep in the corner, he said – ‘oh, why not?

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Thanks to GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories where this week’s prompt word is Heart.

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27 thoughts on “Six more!”

      • beth's avatar beth Feb 16, 2024 / 18:13

        You know I always come back!

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  4. Suzette Benjamin's avatar Suzette Benjamin Feb 15, 2024 / 20:57

    LOL..the corn was all ears…. Thanks for the great laughs Keith. Many good ones in this story…

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  10. Dale's avatar Dale Feb 18, 2024 / 19:04

    Hahaha! We can’t help but laugh after we groan 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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      • Dale's avatar Dale Feb 19, 2024 / 18:24

        You’re such a card, you should be dealt with!

        Like

  12. Liz H-H's avatar Liz H-H Feb 20, 2024 / 03:14

    Oh good god, Keith. That pub ought to stay open all night!

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    Reply

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