for Six Sentence Stories where the given word is Redemption.
The following is a reworked passage from a longer story I wrote several years ago.
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“Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned” he mutters in hushed tones, uncertain he wishes the priest to hear his confession.
The weary padre in his crumpled cassock slouches behind the wooden lattice fidgeting with a worn wooden cross.
One, a habitual criminal who sometimes yearns to be caught, if only to commune with like-minded people, albethey behind bars.
The other, once a defender of the faith, a bestower of redemption but in doubt, wondering why God was forsaking him.
Two lost and lonely souls.
“Five Hail Marys” murmurs one as the other leaves the confessional, five Hail Marys.
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Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting.
Super six
Thanks, Paul.
You paint a vivid, yet desolate picture, Keith. Good Six!
Thank you, Chris.
There is desperation and hopelessness in your characters. Hope they do find redemption
Hopefully, the only way is up. Thanks, Sadje.
You’re welcome! Indeed after hitting rock bottom, the only way is up.
May they both find redemption.
Please, God, they do. Thanks, Frank.
Very well done. A choose your own ending sort of.
Indeed it is! Thanks so much.
My heart aches for both of them.
Thanks, Mimi.
Hey, misery-guts, what happened to the funnies?
Deep piece, sourpuss.
Worry not, it was a one-off. Normal service has been resumed!
Powerful … this gave me chills.
I enjoyed the audio reading of it.
Thank you for adding it.
Isadora 😎
Thanks so much, I’m pleased you enjoyed it, Isadora.
So much despair. May they each discover what is needed.
In time, hopefully. Thanks, Pat.
Brothers in desolation, very vividly described. Great six, Keith.
Indeed they are, thanks so much, Jenne,
Good Six. I loved the reading. I may have to try that sometime.
Thanks, Matt. I thought about it for ages before starting a few months ago and I now wish I’d done it years ago!
Difficult to know who was taking the Hail Mary pass. Enjoyed your shift into serious gear.
It happens now and again, Doug! Who knows, I might even come up with a poem one day!
Steady on, Keith. That’s crazy talk. 🙂
Mankind is broken ever since the third chapter of Genesis, which is exactly why we need the confessional. The priest needs it even more than everyone
Indeed, it all started with the forbidden fruit. He certainly does Larry.
To borrow a word from Pat, the despair was palpable. The priest’s weariness hung heavy like incense in the air.
(Used to wonder as a kid, how they determined the number of hail Marys a person should say).
Thanks, Denise. Interesting you mention that, I went to Google for advice when writing this and I still couldn’t find a definitive answer!
Now that is quite a story! I have often wondered what to the priests behind the confession boxes think and wonder.
I bet they’d love to tell a tale or two!
Great job Keith. I feel like I was there, sitting with both, in the confessional. Fabulous blog. Keep up the great work.
Ryan
That’s so kind of you Ryan, thank you.