A wet one

for Sammi’s Weekend Writing Prompt where the given word is Yard, and the limit, 83 words.

For the uninitiated, Yard of Ale glasses have been around since the 1700’s and were originally used for handing beer up to stagecoach drivers, and also for making ceremonial toasts.

41ZIu+SbWcL._AC_Nowadays the Yard of Ale Contest is played in pubs all over England. You have to drink the entire yard, 2.5 pints in the quickest possible time. Due to the shape of the glass, the beer can’t escape the bottom of the bowl until the glass is tipped right up which can be fairly perilous!

 

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Welcome to the Yard of Ale Contest!   

First up, it’s George. 

Glug-glug-glug-glug … sigh!

Thirty-five seconds, congratulations!

Next, Fred.

Slop-slop-slop-slop … phew!

Twenty-nine seconds, great!

Now for Benedict.

Sip-sip-sip-sip … mmmm!

Three minutes, forty. How gentlemanly!

It’s your turn, Molly.

Whooooosh … yea!

Fourteen seconds, incredible!

Where’s Keith?

Me? Noooo!

You, yes!

No!

Yes!

Okay then, here goes.

Splish-splash-splish-splash-splosh … gasp! 

Sorry mate, you spilt more than you swallowed. Disqualified.

 

At least I tried. I got drenched, but I tell you what, it’s done wonders for my hair!

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Back in 2017 I wrote about such a contest when a competitor managed to get his false teeth stuck in the yard glass! If you’re interested, it’s HERE!

26 thoughts on “A wet one

  1. Denise Sep 11, 2021 / 16:15

    I learned something new. I’ve heard of a ‘yard of ale’, but never knew what is was. I never drink beer because I am allergic. One bad reaction was more than enough for me.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Sep 11, 2021 / 17:09

      I can imagine it was! The only bad reaction I get is to a pint too many. Cheers Denise

      Like

  2. Christine Goodnough Sep 11, 2021 / 16:54

    Interesting history. I’m trying to imagine a stagecoach driver drinking his ale from one of these while jerking over bumpy country roads and cobblestone streets.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Sep 11, 2021 / 17:12

      That’s an interesting image! They would have been used when stopping at coaching inns, far easier to handle when standing still!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. pensitivity101 Sep 11, 2021 / 17:01

    I bought a half yard of ale for ex partner as a novelty Christmas gift one year, though he preferred lager. The first half he got wet, the second and every one thereafter he didn’t spill a drop. I lost count after 10.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Sep 11, 2021 / 17:16

      I’m impressed! There’s definitely an art to it. I had a couple when I ran my pub and now wish I’d taken one when I left!

      Like

  4. hilarymb Sep 12, 2021 / 09:12

    Hi Keith – creatively wet … well done … fun story – and good to pass on our ancient ways. Happy sunny sunday – cheers Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Lorraine Sep 13, 2021 / 04:07

    “Oh those quirky Brits.” I’m sure there’s an American equivalent! Just can’t imagine John Wayne downing one in Doge City! (nudge, nudge, wink, wink).

    Liked by 1 person

      • Lorraine Sep 13, 2021 / 10:26

        Maybe it’s happening in an alternative reality/universe. You never know . . .

        Liked by 1 person

  6. Tessa Sep 15, 2021 / 03:26

    Great story. That would be me, spilling more than I drank!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Bill Sep 15, 2021 / 16:21

    Again and again, you never fail to entertain us. The whole thing. Great!

    Liked by 1 person

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