A hundred words …

for Friday Fictioneers

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00000000000000000000000

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There’s something wrong with this wretched phone.

As you know, I’m an Adonis but the camera thinks I’m grotesque.

In my first selfie, I looked like the back of a bus. Actually, it was a picture of a bus because that about-turn button chose not to work.

As for texting, I received an unfathomable one from Rosey.

how u. seein j tomoz. 4t u mite cum

It has a mind of its own because when I carefully replied, this is what it sent –

Watch massage a boot? I dead nut undertake it 

Like I said, there’s something wrong with this horrible phone.

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aaaaaaaThanks to Rochelle for hosting and to Roger Bultot for the photo.

Click Froggie to join in the fun!

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56 thoughts on “A hundred words …

  1. trentpmcd Jul 28, 2021 / 13:06

    Hate it when the smart phone is smarter than me… but it seems it doesn’t take much for some people.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Jul 28, 2021 / 14:08

      I’d like a semi-smart phone, mine has so many features that are of no interest to me – I’m sure they’re put there just to confuse me!

      Liked by 1 person

      • trentpmcd Jul 28, 2021 / 18:07

        I do OK with smart phones until they think they are smarter than me. I hate, hate when the spell check does to me what it did to the person in your story…

        Liked by 1 person

  2. rochellewisoff Jul 28, 2021 / 13:54

    Dear Keith,

    I missed my weekly portion of magic from you last week. Hope the camping went well. As for texting. It’s best to disable autocorrect. We’re all tired of its shirt. Thanks for the smiles.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Ain Starlingsson Jul 28, 2021 / 14:02

    Behind that sharp humour lies a commentary of today’s world…

    Liked by 1 person

  4. msjadeli Jul 28, 2021 / 16:22

    Texting is one of my least favorite things but it’s what my kids use so there ya go. As far as selfies go, consider yourself blessed you aren’t good at it. People hooked on selfies are insufferable!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Jul 29, 2021 / 13:58

      Like you, I have to text and Whatsap because that’s the way our kids, and their kids, communicate! I’ve never understood the need to take a selfie!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. granonine Jul 28, 2021 / 19:17

    Great stuff, Keith. I hate texting, partly because my English-teacher soul is horrified by what it has done to our language 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Dale Jul 28, 2021 / 20:42

    What the fork? It`s hard enough to understand today’s “yutes” and their texting lingo… add auto-correct and you’ve a whole nother side of the fun. Selfies? I try to avoid them – can’t understand those who feel the need to share their mugs, butts, boobs ad naseam…
    Excellent one 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Jul 29, 2021 / 13:41

      Language Dale!

      I’m with you on selfies, I don’t even like having to have a profile picture!

      When I go on my travels, there’s inevitably a group photo at the end of the trip and I always try to hide!

      Liked by 2 people

      • Dale Jul 29, 2021 / 15:15

        My apologies… 😉

        Ii don’t so much mind being included in photos. With Mick’s death, it’s like I don’t exist anymore (as I take all the pictures).

        It’s the self-promotion that drives me batty.

        Liked by 1 person

      • Keith's Ramblings Jul 29, 2021 / 19:42

        You should wash your mouth out with soup!

        I can fully understand why you’d wish to be in photos, it makes perfect sense.

        Like

  7. pennygadd51 Jul 28, 2021 / 20:42

    Autocorrupt does its deadly work, massacring the language. Well-focussed humour, Keith.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Danny James Jul 28, 2021 / 21:17

    Understand that! Apple transcriptions are a hoot sometimes. I received one from my doctor…”Doctor Running Under Foot”…

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Christine Goodnough Jul 29, 2021 / 01:58

    Looks like we’ve all been there. I disabled auto-correct for awhile, but it turns out that I (blush) make as many mistakes as auto-correct, so it was sick of one and half a dozing of the other. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  10. jenne49 Jul 29, 2021 / 10:31

    Oh Keith, what a wonderful portrayal of the (slightly) older person’s relationship with the mobile phone. I’m sure we can all relate to that! Fabulous! (Incidentally, I have a friend whose husband was called Rex. I once sent her a message: Was Rex good? I leave you to imagine the text she actually got!)

    Liked by 1 person

  11. GHLearner Jul 29, 2021 / 17:06

    I’m laughing so much, my stomach hurts. Perfect. Sounds just like the texts my phone produces.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. plaridel Jul 29, 2021 / 17:08

    fat fingers seem to get in the way. a bigger phone might help. 🙂

    Like

  13. Brenda's Thoughts Jul 30, 2021 / 01:27

    I truly believe my phone has a mind of its own. And, it’s determined to drive me insane. Clever story as always!!

    Liked by 1 person

  14. James McEwan Jul 30, 2021 / 08:49

    Great stuff. We are all guilty of not bothering to learn how to use the features of the gadget, and end up with a sort of learning like osmosis. Then it happens, the Mobile Phone takes over we become lost without its constant presence and guidance, we surrender to cyber space.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. Russell Gayer Jul 30, 2021 / 17:07

    Gud 1, Keith. I have a problem with all the abbreviations (hieroglyphics) people use today. I takes a teenager to decode the messages for me.

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Michael Jul 30, 2021 / 20:10

    Even the way my phones shows the time confuses me. So all the docks around here smile

    Liked by 1 person

  17. michaelwynnauthor Jul 31, 2021 / 14:52

    Ha, darn that autocorrect. I once berrated my partner by text for leaving Marmite all over the place when she had breakfast. She replied that she didn’t like Marmite. I know that, it’s getting the message to my daughter that I was having the problem with.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. Nobbinmaug Jul 31, 2021 / 19:47

    That’s exactly why I don’t take selfies. Autocorrect should be all the warning we need about sentient AI.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. Woman walking Max Aug 1, 2021 / 14:55

    very witty Keith ! Predictive text and me don’t get on. Will my friends think I’m daffy ? No more than usual I hope LOL

    Like

  20. Lorraine Aug 2, 2021 / 08:03

    When I dictate a text on my phone, for some reason, autocorrectum turns at least one or too words into bawdy parts, so I understand your ggrr!

    Like

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