for Sadje’s What Do You See? prompt section
My muse seems to have gone AWOL, so I dug out a story I wrote for Six Sentence Stories in 2017 and added some bits to it! From the comments it received, I know that some of you read it, but hopefully, you’ve forgotten it by now!
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I quite enjoy being a statue, it’s great being able to watch people without being asked what I’m staring at.
Oh-oh, here comes another lot, time to put on my stony-faced expression again…pardon the pun!
I love listening to what people say. The other day, a bloke looked me up and down and said to his wife “I wish you had a pair like that” and he got a slap around the face!
Here come twenty old folks with their tour guide.
“How interesting, George… goodness me, Gladys … I say, Sebastian… well I never, Reginald …that’s fascinating, Frances … isn’t she beautiful Doris?”
Goodie goodie, there’s a handsome chap heading my way.
‘Try stroking my marble young man, oooh, you cheeky boy!’
The other day I overheard somebody say “the ancient Greeks made statues without arms”.
“So how did they hold their chisels and hammers?” asked his friend!
Oh good, the lights are going out and it’s almost time to join One Tit Tina and Noseless Nick for our nightly chit-chat, and Headless Harry too – no doubt he’ll be talking out of his ass as usual. Charles would love to have a chin-wag, but unfortunately, his dropped off his head a couple of centuries ago!
Before you leave the museum, here’s a riddle for you. Why do some people ignore statues? Because they take us for granite!
Right, I’m off a stiff drink, bye!
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Image credit; Cottonbro studio @ Pexels
Haha! Great story from the perspective of the exhibits there. Thanks Keith for joining in.
I thought they deserved to be heard!
Of course they do.
Cleverly written, Keith.
Thanks so much, Nicole!
Love this – if only we could hear what statues say 🙂
One day we may, nothing surprises me with technology these days!
Statues probably have a lot of stories they could tell.
Some have seen a thing or two over the centuries!
Heeheehee! I wonder if she ever gets bored or if she’s just happy being a people watcher.
I think it’s probably the latter, she has got a bit of a saucy grin!
Insanely funny and fabulously vivid, Keith. 🙂
Haha, that’s really kind of you, Natasha!
Enjoyed this 💙
This was a hilarious read! Loved the puns!
I’m pleased, thanks so much Aboli!