It’s a Sixer!

Keith's Ramblings

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Farmer Fred kept yawning, “I didn’t sleep too well last night, the missus kept nudging me, she said I was taking up too much of the bed she deserved a larger share, anyway, this morning she suggested we get a new bed, maybe a king sized one, I said that wouldn’t help because HRH Charlie is only five feet and ten inches tall, and I’m six feet two – I’d sleep better in the barn on a bed of hay bales!”

“Talking of being tired”, said Arthur, “I was a bit sleepy when I went to the footie match in town on Saturday, it’s was Bedding versus Bunkup or something like that, well, it was a bit boring so I dozed off only to be woken up by bawling and bellowing when sometime scored a goal, it was bedlam, fortunately things calmed down again so I was able to return to the land of nod, I’ve no idea which team won”.

“I have wonderful dreams”, said Babs, “I have more fun in bed than I do when I’m up and about, trouble is I can never recall much about them so I thought I’d get myself one of those memory foam pillows, I assume they’re meant to help you remember things, anyway, last night I had a great dream, but the pillow made no difference, however I when I woke up I suddenly remember I’d forgotten to change the duvet cover and pillow cases yesterday – its was obviously being a bit selfish!”

Polly over in the knitting circle had been eavesdropping – she always does – “I kept having this stupid dream in which my chickens were taking part in a soccer match”, she said, “so I went to see the doctor this morning and she prescribed some tablets she thought would help and  told me to start taking them before bed tonight; I said I’d rather wait until tomorrow, because tonight it’s the final!”.

Last week I mentioned that the Baaamy Barbecue was taking place next month and Landlord Len was getting gardener Gary to sort out the somewhat overgrown space, well, he did a grand job sorting out the flower beds, but the locals were not exactly enamored by the new-look lawn – the real grass had been replaced with that artificial stuff, Len’s excuse was that his dearly departed Maggie always tended the turf and he never really got into the swing of it, so he saw the pretend stuff as a sensible alternative; “I don’t cut the grass in my meadow”, said cattle farmer Colin, “I get my mowcows to go it do it for me!”

…and then he was off – “I told my field of cows to go to sleep, ‘it’s pasture bedtime’ I said – astronauts sleep alone because they need their space – you make a water bed more bouncy by using spring water – what do you call people who sleep in their socks? Tiny – I couldn’t sleep last night because I was trying to remember the difference between insomnia and amnesia – the office workers kept falling asleep, they were a dream team – I dreamt I saw a color I’d never seen before, but it was just a pigment of my imagination – I asked my pillow if it wanted something to eat and it said, ‘no, thanks I’m stuffed’ – what did the blanket say as it fell off the bed? oh sheet …” ; ”OY” yelled Landlord Len, “I don’t tolerate that kind of language in my pub”, and so ended another session at The Baaamy Inn.

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T.

Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories. This week’s given word is Bed.

23 thoughts on “It’s a Sixer!”

  1. Suzette Benjamin's avatar Suzette Benjamin May 22, 2025 / 16:52

    Hilarious! I love the sleep puns pasture bedtime and stuffed pillow…Well done Keith. Thanks for the chuckles.

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  4. Violet Lentz's avatar Violet Lentz May 22, 2025 / 18:59

    One of the highlights of my week, a few moments spent at the Baaamy! Thank you for another thoroughly enjoyable stay.

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  5. clark's avatar clark May 22, 2025 / 21:07

    how good is the world you’ve created here?

    …I simply started smiling when I encountered: “…so I thought I’d get myself one of those memory foam pillows”

    …just because

    nice

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  6. Frank Hubeny's avatar Frank Hubeny May 22, 2025 / 21:37

    Colin’s observations were great as was Bab’s reason for getting the memory foam pillow.

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    • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings May 25, 2025 / 11:49

      I was thinking of getting rid of my pillow – then I thought I’m not sure, I’d better sleep on it.

      Thanks, Denise!

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