It’s a Sixa!

Keith's Ramblings

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There was a shiny new Range Rover in the Baaamy Inn’s carpark, it belonged to Ted, “it’s very modern”, he said, “and it’s taking a bit of getting used to it, it hasn’t got a key, you start it by pressing a button and it changes gear all by itself – I keep lowering my hand expecting a feel a knob – it even bleeps when you reverse, the day I need help going backwards into a parking space is the day I stop driving, I’ve actually got it on a lease”;  “why are worried it might run away?” asked Arthur; “not a leash, a lease!”

“My car’s got that satnav thing in it”, said George, ”when I’m using it with the missus sitting next to me it’s like having two wives, turn right, turn left, go there, go here; at least I can shup one up by prodding a symbol on the dashboard, I sometimes wish I could get that symbol tattooed on the wife’s forehead”

Babs was not happy with the tone of the conversation and decided to change the subject; “someone new has taken out a lease on that pub called The Barn”, she said, “apparenty it’s doing quite well and he’s looking for more people to work there, he’s put a sign outside saying ‘Staff wanted apply with Inn!

“Talking of barns” said Arthur, “I’ve rented one of mine out to this bloke for several years, and the other day he told me he no longer needs it, well, I was thinking I could smarten it up and turn into a venue for wedding receptions and parties, the thing is, the lease still has a year to run so I’m not sure what to do; Suzie leapt to her feet and started to sing, “p-lease re-lease me let me go!”

Colin had been listening into the conversations as usual hoping to gather fodder for his weekly routine – “I leased  a wooden car with a wooden engine and wooden wheels, it wooden start – I rented a limo once but it came without a driver, all that money spent and nothing chauffeur it – a soldier and I leased an appartment, I had the right side and he was the left tenant – a soldier that lives in a toilet is a loo tenant – how many ants does it take to rent a house? ten ants – Shakespeare walks in to a pub and the landlord says “Oy, you’re Bard!’ – an Englishman, Irishman and a Scotsman walk in a bar and the landlord asked if it was some kind of joke – I went to Blockbusters and asked if I could rent Batman Forever and the man at the counter said, no, you can only rent it for a week.………”

It’s Easter Sunday this weekend and instead of the farming folk and nattering knitters, the pub will be filled with happy families; as usual, Landlord Len will have an Easter Egg hunt in the garden for the children, Maggie started it many years ago and he likes to keep it going in her memory; she always gave a chocolate bunny rabbit to any of the kids that didn’t manage to collect any eggs so at least they went home with something – a tradition he continues!

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Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories where this week’s given word is Lease.

32 thoughts on “It’s a Sixa!”

  1. Frank Hubeny's avatar Frank Hubeny Apr 17, 2025 / 15:54

    I like Maggie’s Easter tradition. George made a good point that having a GPS on when driving is like having two wives in the car. Colin’s puns were great, as usual.

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  4. beth's avatar beth Apr 17, 2025 / 17:29

    I love the Easter tradition, but what’s to come?…

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  6. Suzette Benjamin's avatar Suzette Benjamin Apr 17, 2025 / 20:51

    “…rent Batman Forever!” Ahahaha, great writing as always, Keith. What a nice ending with kind Maggie’s generous heart remembered… a fitting Easter tradition.

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  7. Violet Lentz's avatar Violet Lentz Apr 17, 2025 / 21:28

    I have no idea how you come up with all these plays on words. but the P-lease re-lease me made me laugh out loud.

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  14. clark's avatar clark Apr 19, 2025 / 21:23

    not a leash, a lease!” (bar rum bump! good start!) lol

    I’m with the others on Maggie’s Easter Tradition… (gotta love how people live on in tales and fiction, memory and emotion… especially in a place like this…. the blogosphere in general and the Baaamy Inn in particular)

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    • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings Apr 20, 2025 / 17:00

      Thank you!

      I inherited several traditions when I took over my village pub. I’d like to think my successors have carried them on.

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