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It was another Friday night at The Baaamy Inn and as per usual the farmers were enjoying a pint or three of frothing ale while catching up on the week’s events; “I came here for lunch the other day” said Arthur, “I had one of Len’s Ploughmans, a wedge of cheddar, some crusty bread and chutney, it was tasty”; “speaking of cheese” said Babs “I’m told that Donald Trump is going to ban the sale of pre-shredded cheese, he wants to make America grate again!” – “OY”, yelled Len, “I told you last week, we don’t discuss American politics in my pub”.
Colin was quick off the mark, usually his cheesy routine takes place later in the evening – “some French cheese exploded, there was de brie everywhere – priests prefer Swiss cheese because it’s holey – I put parmesan on spaghetti for the grater good – which cheese is made backwards? edam – someone stole my cheese joke the other day, how dairy – Medusa’s favourite cheese is Gorgonzola…” ; Suzie at the next table leapt to her feet and started singing, “sweet dreams are made of cheese, who am I to disabrie?”
Keen to change the subject Ted started to tell them about something that happened on the golf course the previous weekend, “I offered to play a round with a new member, well, we were heading for the eighth hole and Jimmy, that’s his name, was about to swing his wedge when a funeral procession passed by, he stopped, removed his cap and bowed his head; I complimented him on being so respectful and he said it was the least he could do, after all they’d been married for thirty-five years!”
As usual the ladies of the knitting circle had been un-discreetly listening in, “my husband took a spare set of trousers to the golf club the other day” said Poppy, “I asked him why and he said it was in case he got a hole in one, then I asked if he wanted to take a packed lunch and he asked for a sand wedge and flask of tee!” ; “are you sure he’s not related to Colin?” asked Masie!
“Talking of wedges” said Phylis, “I remember we used to have shoes with wedge heels, they were quite clumsy to walk in but not as bad as those great big Cuban heels”; “at least stiletto heels keep you on your toes” said Poppy, “ although I bought a cheap pair once, I went out in high heels and got back in flip-flops!”
The evening drew to a close and as the last of the regulars left the pub Len kicked away the wedge and closed the door; then he picked it up, stared at it for a second or two and said, “you’ve done me proud Wedgey, you welcomed everybody by keeping the door open for them for them for the past few months, but now it’s time for you to hibernate until Spring” ; “you and your wedge” chuckled a distant voice!
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Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories where this week’s given word is Wedge
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Nice ones: “priests prefer Swiss cheese because it’s holey” and “at least stiletto heels keep you on your toes”
Nice last paragraph where Len showed his gratitude to Wedgey.
Thanks, Frank, I’m pleased you liked them!
Haha! Your puns are exceptional Keith.
I enjoy a punfest now and again! Thanks, Sadje.
😂😂😂
sweet dreams are made of cheese, who am I to disabrie? 😂😂😂
Hilarious take, Keith
I trust you sang along, Shweta!
Haha. Oh, you know me well, Keith!
I think your puns are improving all of the time
Thanks, Beth, I always strive to be a pundle of joy!
Simply brilliant, Keith!
I still think you should make a collection of your recordings.
Thanks for your kind words, Nick. I wonder….
rare form this week, yo
fave: sweet dreams are made of cheese, who am I to disabrie?”
I’ll tell Suzie you liked it! Cheers. Clark!
No such thing as too cheesy …. and you just proved that! Hilarious six, Keith. The funeral pun had me LOL! Grate stuff, my piquant cheeseball! 🤩
Cheese, sorry, cheers Nancy! I’m pleased you like the funeral pun – after all, the first three letters of funeral are fun!
It’s always fun to read what’s up at the Baaamy. Nice installment!
Thanks, Mimi, there’s never a dull moment there!
Ho, ho, let’s all sing cheese (just like Suzie… and Clark)!!
Cheese Louise, Keith! These puns’ll make me forget all my troubles!
You’ve out-punned yourself, Keith! Top prize to Suzie this week for her brilliant “sweet dreams are made of cheese, who am I to disabrie?”