.
.
Spears of rain darted down, piercing his hands and face like a thousand needles. In his arms, he carried a heavy load. Not far to go, the door was in sight. He fumbled for his keys, but his numb fingers let them fall at his feet. His precious load was becoming heavier by the second but he daredn’t let it slip from his grasp. Scooping the keys from the ground took all the effort he could muster. He pressed one into the lock, twisted it, and the door swung open.
He stumbled into the pitch-black entrance, felt for the light switch then started to climb the steep staircase to his apartment. One slow step at a time, each of them more difficult than the last. Ten steps to go, nine, eight …… then the timed light went out. Total darkness. He swore out loud as he tripped then swiftly grabbed the handrail. His arms were giving way, but he wasn’t giving up, not as he was so close.
He reached the summit and stabbed the light switch. He knelt, resting his load on his knee and once again searched for his keys. With all his might he rose to his feet, placed one in the lock and flung open the door. He triumphantly carried his cherished cargo across the threshold, lowered it to the floor then lay down alongside, totally exhausted but elated.
“Thank you for becoming my wife today,” he said, “but that’s the last time I carry you anywhere!”.
.
Word count 250
Thanks to Jenne Gray and C.E.Ayr for hosting The Unicorn Challenge
*I chose to go with the word on the building and stick to locks and keys!
© Ayr/Gray
Excellent story telling Keith. You kept the story suspense till the last line.
Thanks so much, Sadje.
You’re most welcome 🙏🏼
Nicely done Keith, it gave me a laugh at the end. I thought he was struggling with a dead body the way the suspense was building. I read it to my wife & she guessed a stack of Pizzas. She laughed at the ending too.
That would be quite a feast! Delighted to have amused you both, thank you.
hahahahaha
Just what I hoped for!
That’s on the threshold of believability, Keith, and hilariously so. 🙂
You think so? Thanks so much!
Great take on the prompt. You held my interest to the end. I love the phrase “stabbed the light switch”..what an image!
Great photo prompt too. I love weathered doors and their stories.
I’m pleased you liked it, Suzette. I’ve got quite a few picures of worn doors and windows, I might dig them out one Wordless Wednesday!
Great! I look foward to them whenever you choose to share. Doors are a fascination of mine, as you know…Lol!
I do!
Beautifully descriptive, devilishly clever and so very naughty of you, Keith! You really had me going, wondering what your MC’s precious cargo could be. I wasn’t expecting the pun at the end and had a good laugh. Well done!
Mission accomplished! Thanks Nancy.
very nicely done!
totally blind-sided by your punchline.
(dude, you’re seriously good at being funny)
You say the kindest things, thankyou!
Wonderful! I loved it.
I’m pleased, thanks, Mimi.
I am cackling!!! Just what I needed this evening…you never disappoint.
Thanks for your kind words!
You’re always welcome, friend.
I was exhausted by the time he got into the apartment too – the great descriptions building tension – will he, won’t he?
And then the unexpercted ending.
A great story, Keith.
Thank you, I needed a lie down after writing it, Jenne!
Hahaha I didn’t expect that, Keith. Good one.
LOL loved this!
Gotta say, old Pip, that I fear this marriage is already in trouble when he refers to the beloved as ‘a heavy load’!
Fun as ever, sir!