A musement …

Keith's Ramblings

for The Sunday Muse

.

zzzzzz

‘

Jane, I’ve found the perfect place, a cottage in the countryside.

It needs a bit of touching up, but I know how much you love DIY.  Some filler here, a lick of paint there, oh, and you’ll need to bang in some picture hooks. 

There are a few cracked windows but you’ll easily fix them, you’re very handy with putty.

Several kitchen cupboards have collapsed so I’ll get you some screws, and maybe even a new screwdriver! 

It’s got amazing views; at least it will have when you’ve done a bit of that gardening you so enjoy, felling those trees shouldn’t be too much trouble.

The roof leaks a bit, but don’t worry, I’ll hold the ladder for you, and as you love playing with Lego with the kids you’ll find rebuilding the chimney a doddle.

Me? Oh, I’ll plug in the television and may even find out where the nearest pub is. I’m going to be in need of a beer or two with all that activity going on!

So, what do you think?

‘

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32 thoughts on “A musement …”

  2. Patricia Jul 23, 2022 / 17:27

    Always good to give advice and encouragement. Even better if it comes with muscle to help with the work. Then relax together with a beer or two. That’s what you meant, right?

    Liked by 2 people

    Reply
  3. pensitivity101 Jul 23, 2022 / 17:48

    Second word from me would be ‘….off’ Keith LOL. I had enough of the DI-Y in my last relationship!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  4. Sherry Marr Jul 23, 2022 / 18:18

    I think this poem could have been written by my ex-husband, who would lie on the couch and tell me I could paint more efficiently if I did a better job of smoothing the paintbrush along the edge of the can after dipping. A neighbour who saw me through the window actually came in to see why I was painting and not my husband, given I had three kids under six. LOL.

    Liked by 1 person

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  7. Suzette Benjamin Jul 23, 2022 / 20:24

    Someone is perhaps carrying the heavier load. Ah, but then again…advice with such hefty claims can be…weighty 🤣

    Liked by 1 person

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  8. Rob Kistner Jul 23, 2022 / 20:47

    I like the wit and humor here Keith — made me smile. That was considerate of you to get the ladder, and such wonderful activities you found for your wife — bet she loved you for it! 😉 Too bad you had to do that walkin’ to get to the pub 🍻 — but a man’s gotta do what a man’s gotta do. 😓

    Liked by 2 people

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    • Keith's Ramblings Jul 24, 2022 / 12:52

      I quite agree but it was well worth the effort! Fortunately, my wife collected me so I didn’t have to walk back home!

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  10. Rall Jul 23, 2022 / 23:41

    Erm…..I think you should make it very clear that this is a joke against MCP men…..otherwise I would buy a guard dog and double bolt the doors

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • Keith's Ramblings Jul 24, 2022 / 12:55

      Wise advice Rall, I think I’ll do just that – as soon as she’s fixed the bolt to the door!

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  12. Christine Goodnough Jul 24, 2022 / 06:00

    I hope she can take a joke — otherwise that place could become the perfect doghouse for him to spend his time in. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  13. wyndolynne Jul 24, 2022 / 14:51

    LOL, I think Legos might “accidentally” be left on the path to the pub. 🙂 Also, if only house reno was that easy. I’m up for a bit of papier mache wall repair.

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    • Keith's Ramblings Jul 24, 2022 / 16:57

      I trod barefoot on some Lego the other day, ouch! When he was in student accommodation, my son repaired a wall using bread pudding!

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  15. Jim Jul 25, 2022 / 04:54

    It stinks for her!! 🙂
    I suppose there are such folks, most women can paint pretty good
    but have problems with the nail poundings.
    ..

    Like

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