Sixty-seven words …

Keith's Ramblings

for Sammi’s Weekend Writing Prompt

 

vtks-blackhair.regular

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‘She’s a wonderful daughter.  I changed my will yesterday,  she deserves everything.  She’s just brought my warm milk and pills.  They look different today.  The doctor probably changed them’. 

The chair creaks as she gently rocks him.  His breathing slows. The glass shatters upon impact with the floor.  Trying to speak, his slurred words fade, he drifts away. 

No need to visit tomorrow.  She turns, smiles, leaves.

.

 

eeeeeeee

 

37 thoughts on “Sixty-seven words …”

  1. Sadje's avatar Sadje August 23, 2020 / 09:59

    This is very unexpected!

    Reply
      • Sadje's avatar Sadje August 23, 2020 / 11:36

        You’re welcome Keith

  5. Denise D Hammond's avatar Denise D Hammond August 23, 2020 / 12:12

    Unfortunately, stuff like that happens. Or do I watch too much true crime TV?

    Reply
  6. messymimi's meanderings's avatar messymimi's meanderings August 23, 2020 / 14:09

    It is worth waiting and loving, always. Those who choose such evil paths complain when they reap what they have sown. It plays out, every time.

    Well told!

    Reply
    • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings August 23, 2020 / 17:40

      I totally agree but my subject wouldn’t listen! Cheers Mimi.

      Reply
  7. rochellewisoff's avatar rochellewisoff August 23, 2020 / 14:14

    Dear Keith,

    I had a feeling about her from the first sentence. Well done. As always, you amaze me with the graphics. 😀

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Reply
    • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings August 23, 2020 / 17:38

      Thanks Rochelle – for me the graphics are half the fun!

      Reply
  8. Sue's avatar Sue August 23, 2020 / 14:59

    Powerful and disturbing! Well done, Keith.

    Reply
  9. Na'ama Yehuda's avatar Na'ama Yehuda August 23, 2020 / 15:26

    Oy vey. I thought this was where it was going, and in 67 words, I didn’t have long to wait … 😉
    Full story in a small package. Nicely done! (not so nice for the man …)

    Reply
    • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings August 23, 2020 / 17:13

      The first draft was a large package, and boy it was difficult trimming it down!

      Reply
      • Na'ama Yehuda's avatar Na'ama Yehuda August 23, 2020 / 17:52

        You did good! The trim works! Open a barber shop? 😉

      • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings August 24, 2020 / 09:21

        That’s an idea! Thanks Na’ama

  10. Bill's avatar Bill August 23, 2020 / 17:27

    Nicely done, Keith.
    I am going to assume that she assisted with his departure at his request, and with the pharmaceutical guidance of the physician. 🙂

    Reply
    • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings August 23, 2020 / 17:35

      I’d like to think so but I had in mind a somewhat more sinister turn of events! Cheers Bill.

      Reply
      • Bill's avatar Bill August 23, 2020 / 17:48

        Me too.

  11. Danny James's avatar Danny James August 23, 2020 / 18:33

    I don’t think it was the doctor that changed them.

    Reply
  12. Dale's avatar Dale August 23, 2020 / 19:28

    Not so wonderful and a tad impatient to get her inheritance. Be careful, you awful person, karma is a bitch…
    Well done!

    Reply
      • Dale's avatar Dale August 24, 2020 / 13:24

        Done!

  13. Ashley Coulthard's avatar Ashley Coulthard August 24, 2020 / 02:53

    Hello! I’m a first-time visitor and already, you’ve got me by the gut! I enjoyed reading this.

    Reply
  14. Christine Goodnough's avatar Christine Goodnough August 24, 2020 / 03:27

    Well and miserly worded. Sad tale though. When she get old, she’ll remember, and always wonder what might be in her warm milk.

    Reply
  15. Jen Goldie's avatar Jen Goldie August 24, 2020 / 17:50

    Wow! Well done Keith!

    Reply
  16. hilarymb's avatar hilarymb August 26, 2020 / 09:35

    Hi Keith – yes I hope she has a guilt complex and will forever be anxious/worried … good tale though – stay safe – Hilary

    Reply

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