Loan!

It was another evening at The Baaamy Inn, and shepherdess Babs was talking about her trip to the library, “there’s a new book about what sheep think called I Herd You, I thought I’d loan a copy; visiting there took me back to my days at Agricultural College when I had a part time job in a library next to a McDonalds, the money I earned went towards paying off my student loan, well, one afternoon a girl came in and said, ‘a burger, fries and a coke please’, I said ‘this is the library, then she whispered, ‘a burger, fries and a coke please’!“

“Talking of books reminds me of when my son wrote one called How to Make Money”, said Ted, “he wanted to self-publish it, but it would have been very expensive, and he couldn’t get a loan; I wasn’t able to help him either, except for giving him a bit of advice: ‘read your own book’, I told him!

Over at the knitting circle Polly was telling them about a visit she made to Lucy, the lonely goatherd in the next village, “she needs a bit of human company now and again, while I was there she gave me some balls of wool made from goat’s hair, she said she can hardly tie her shoelaces so knitting is out of the question; it’s a bit chunky so I wondered if I could loan your mega-needles, Natalie, I thought I could make a throw and give it to her for Christmas, she’ll be alone again so she might find it comforting”- Suzie leapt to her feet and began to sing “all by myself, don’t wanna be all by mysef…”

“My grandson asked if he could loan my car the other day”, said Arthur, “well, a couple of days later he hadn’t returned it, so I phoned him; he said he’d driven to my place a couple of times, but my driveway was empty so he assumed I was out, he was kidding of course; he likes to joke, a bit like you, Colin, you ought to have a head-to-head one day!”

“A cop stopped a car”, said Colin, and asked ‘where are you headed, whose car is it and what do you do?’, and the miner said ‘mine’ – I read a book call How To Survive Falling Down Stairs, it’s a step by step guide – the farming student didn’t know what kind of farming to do, there were so many fields to choose from – thank you for my student loan, I don’t know how I’ll ever repay you – Pink Floyd left those kids a loan – I wanted a loan to start a distillery business but the bank thought it was a whiskey business – then I thought about a drone pizza delivery business, but the bank said it was pie in the sky – fish keep their money in a river bank – shrimps borrow money from a prawnbroker – 007 invests his money in bonds, stocks and bonds – the term cash-cow sounds like udder non-cents to me – Owen was always in debt – always borrow from a pessamist, they never expect to get it back….”

As Len turned the key in the lock, Suzie’s song started playing in his mind, “although you left Maggie, I knew I’d never be all by myself”, he muttered”; ‘you are not alone, I am here with you, though we’re far apart, you’re always in my heart’, she sang.