Keith's Ramblings

.

.

They were all present and correct at The Baaamy Inn, and with a snap of his fingers, Ted stood then marched to the bar for another round of drinks; “I used to hate people snapping their fingers at me when I was a part-time waiter whilst at Agricultural College”, said Arthur, “once when it happened I walked over to the table and this pompous bloke said, ‘I bet you can’t guess how I like my steak cooked’, I said ‘medium rare?’, then he clapped his hands and said, ‘well done, lad’, I wasn’t sure what to think!”

“During my younger years”, said Babs, “I thought I’d try earning money as a photographer, choosing the camera wasn’t easy, but I made a snap decision and bought the cheapest one I could, well, a couple I met asked me to take some pictures at their wedding and on the big day I aimed my camera at them and said, ‘say cheese’; they frowned instead of smiling – I wasn’t to know they were vegans, anyway, the most I ever earned with my cameras was when I sold it”.

“I bought myself an expensive camera to take on a safari holiday with my mate Bob”, said Bill, “we got ourselves some wide-brimmed hats and camouflage outfits; I found myself some decent trekking boots, but Bob bought some running shoes – when I asked him why, he said ‘in case we got chased by a lion’, so I said ‘you’ll never outrun a lion,’ and he said, ’no, but I’ll outrun you!’ “

Bert started telling them about a card game he played with his grandson, “he wanted to play snap, and he took it very seriously –  two sixes, snap, two kings, snap, two aces, snap, – he was totally expressionless; I said he should learn his Grandma’s favourite game; he asked what it was and I said ‘Poker’, well, he walked over to her, pointed his finger, prodded her cheek and said ‘what’s your favourite game Gran?’ “

Colin’s moment had arrived, “I snapped my fingers to get a waiter’s attention, now I need surgery – say what you like about waiters, they bring a lot to the table – I said to the waitress ’can I ask you about the menu please?’, and she said. ‘mind your own business –  a waiter asked how I found my steak and I said ‘easy, it was next to the fries’ – I asked the waitress if she had a lobster tail and she said, ‘once upon a time there was a lobster called Larry…’ – the problem with my salad needs addressing –  I tried taking a photo of fog, but I mist – my wife wanted to see 50 Shades of Grey so I took a snap shot of her hair – this morning she woke up with a huge smile on her face, I love Sharpies – the wrong photo went to jail, it was framed – I don’t play poker in the jungle, they’re all a bunch of cheetahs – worst of all are the bluffalos…….”

Later that night, Landlord Len was looking through a box of old photos when he came across a beautiful snap of his dearly departed Maggie; as he climbed into bed, he placed it upon the empty pillow alongside his, “night night, Maggie”, he muttered, “I’ll see you in my dreams”; ‘that was always our special song, Len’, she whispered in his ear, ‘night night my love’.

‘

.

Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories, where this week’s given word is Snap