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It’s another evening at The Baaamy Inn and over at the round table, the ladies of the knitting circle are talking about funny errors they’ve made, like when Polly made five holes for four buttons and Betty made a glove with six fingers, “I was sitting knitting a jumper while watching a movie with my grandkids, the one about Nellie the Elephant”, said Natalie, “I was so absorbed in the film that I inadvertently knitted a third sleeve, well, just for a laugh I tried it on and one of the children said, ‘Granny, you look just like Nellie!’ “.
“My wife thinks I’m going deaf”, said Arthur, “the other evening I sat myself down at the dinner table and my wife called from the kitchen, ‘do you want two sausages or three?’, then she went into the hall and shouted ‘do you want two sausages or three?’, then she came closer and said ‘do you want two sausages or three?’, so I said ‘I told you the first time, I want three’ – and she thinks it’s me that’s hard of hearing!”
“I went to the karaoke session at The Fish Inn with my friend Big Bertha the other night”, said Babs, “she loves a good sing-song, when it came to her turn she climbed up on a table and belted out a song while swinging her arms around and jumping up and down; when she finished a guy called out, ‘nice legs’, and Bertha said ‘thank you’, he said ‘I meant the table’s legs, they must be pretty stong to support you,’ the cheeky devil!” – Suzie at the next table leapt to feet and started dancing and singing, “you put your right arm in, you right arm out, in out in out and shake it all about….”
Instead of playing golf, Ted had spent much of the day at the furniture store with his good lady, “our old stuff’s looking a bit tired so we thought we’d treat ourselves to some new bits and pieces, we chose a nice dining table and some really smart chairs, then the salesman shows us a fancy sofa; he said it would seat six people with no problem – I said I didn’t know six people without problems, and he gave me an odd look – I don’t think he realised I was joking”.
“Sofa so good then”, quipped Colin, and he was off – “King Arthur’s round table was made by Sir Cumference – a bloke in the street offered me a settee and some armchairs, but I never take suites from strangers – I stubbed my toe on the sofa, couch!!!! – when the man who invented to remote contol died they found him down the back of the sofa – the furniture competition was a drawer – old chairs are given to charity – kings call musical chairs a Game of Thrones – a cat swallowed some wool and had mittens – Mary’s hobbies were swimming and knitting but her wool kept getting wet – my friend won’t sing with me so I have to duet alone – a singer’s favourite sausage is so-la-me …….”
Before retiring for the night, Landlord Len was watering a pot plant when he found a table tennis ball in the foliage, yesterday he’d found one behind the whisky bottles and the day before there was one in the log basket; he’d held another ping-pong tournament at the weekend and it had been a great success – it was something his dealy departed Maggie started many years ago; as he was about to turn out the lights he noticed a ball on the shelf behind a picture of them together, it had an kiss marked on it – ‘at last’, Maggie whipered, ‘I left it for you, I thought you’d never find it!.
Thanks to Denise for hosting Six Sentence Stories where this week’s given word is Table.
Hilarious storytelling, Keith. I love the one about the sofa” “I don’t know six people without problems!”…oh my goodness.”
The simplest are often the best! Thanks so much, Suzette.
Yes, so true. You are welcome, Keith. Have a good one!
Lovely ending this week Keith.
I can always rely on Maggie! Thanks, Di.
She’s lovely Keith.
so-la-me! 😂
…..do I hear the sound of music?
Heeheehee! The Baaamy never fails to enchant and entertain.
That’s why I keep going back there! Thanks, Mimi.
I like how Ted couldn’t think of six people without problems to sit on his new sofa (or at least the one the salesman was trying to sell him).
He probably decided upon a smaller one! Thanks, Frank.
fave line: “…he said it would seat six people with no problem – I said I didn’t know six people without problems,”
very nice: “… ‘at last’, Maggie whispered, ‘I left it for you, I thought you’d never find it!.”
From amusing to musing. Thanks, Clark!
i love the sausages one!
…sorry. I didn’t catch what you said, Beth!
You are hilarious, some of them crack me up for good especially the first one. I come here well we’ll prepared for your jokes (from reading them for past weeks) and you still manage to get a laugh out of me. That’s how good those sixes are
That’s so nice to hear, Reelika, especially as it always takes me an entire day to write and record the six! Thank you SO much!
Very interesting 6 Keith
Thank you so much, Sadje.
You’re very welcome 😉
All great, but I enjoyed the sausages the most!
Those sausages seem to have gone down quite well!
👏😂great story telling Keith and fab ending 🙌
I’m so pleased you enjoyed it, Ange!
Such a pleasant visit with my favorite pub mates!
I’m pleased – by the way, it’s your turn to buy a round next week!
Ted’s was my favorite (of course!), Colin running neck and neck with him. Don’t know what we’d do without the Baaamy Inn, Keith!