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Beware, there’s a rude word hidden in the Knitwit’s sentence, I hope Len doesn’t hear it or I’ll be in all sorts of trouble!
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Welcome back to The Baaamy Inn where farmer Arthur seems to be in a little bit of pain, “I had my Covid jab this morning, and I’m feeling rather sore, when I got home my grandson told me that lots of injections are given in vain, then he walked away laughing his little head off – the other day he told me to open the medicine cabinet quietly so as not to wake up the sleeping pills, he does say the oddest things!”
“I was talking to Sally the surgery nurse the other day”, said Babs, “they do get some peculiar patients, one bloke told the doctor he was a bit puzzled because he’s having strange premonitions, Doc asked him when it started and he said, ‘next Tuesday’, another patient said ‘I’m having amnesia and deja vu at the same time, and I think I’ve forgotten this before’!”
Over at the knitting circle Natilie was speaking quietly so Landlord Len couldn’t hear her, “a few of us went to The Fish Inn the other night, the puzzles in their pub quiz are far more fun than the ones here, anyway, we needed a name for our team, United Friends, Friends United, Clever Friends, Friendly Five, the names kept coming, then, tongue firmly in cheek, I suggested Friends Using Combined Knowledge and we should go by its acronym – it took them a while to get the joke after which we settled on The Baaamy Bunch!”
“There were two blokes sitting over there yesterday”, said Ted, “they’d clearly had a little too much to drink, well, one guy addopted a puzzled expression said to other, ‘you look familiar where are you from?’, and he replied ‘Dublin’, and then the first bloke said ‘me too, what a coincidence, where in Dublin?’ and the other one said ‘O’Donnel street’ and the first one said ‘me too, what what a small world’ – then Len came over and told me they were the Murphy twins, and they aways get a bit confused after a few pints of the black stuff!” – Suzie at the next table leapt to her feet and started singing her favourite Irish song – “You’re drunk, you’re drunk you silly old fool, still you can not see….”
Colin’s moment had arrived, “my Nan thought she was doing a jigsaw puzzle of a chicken, I told to put the cornflakes back in the box – the inventor of the jigsaw puzzle died, his wife’s in pieces – the crossword clue was ‘four letters, do something dishonestly’, I thought about Googling the answer but I didn’t want to cheat – I draw the line at join-the-dot puzzles – a fake sudoku is a pseudo-ku – the Egyptian boy seemed puzzled when his Daddy died and became a Mummy – the ant was confused because his uncles were ants – it bugs me when people confuse etymology and entomology – I went to the doctor because I had hearing problems, he asked me to describe the symptoms and I said Homer’s fat, and Marge has blue hair – the puzzled panda was bamboo-zled……!
Len was thinking about how much his dearly departed Maggie loved the monkey puzzle tree on the village green, ‘you always said it the only puzzle that no one knew the answer to’, Len muttered – ‘except the monkey, Len!’, she whispered in his ear.
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Incase you are unfamiliar with Suzie’s favourite Irish song and wish to hear it – here goes!
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Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories where this week’s given word is Puzzle.
Hahahaha 😂
Pleased to have amused you Maggie!
The twins: “You look familiar…”Ahahaha..I am still laughing Keith…LOL!
I know, I can hear you!
Awesome!
Fun one again Keith.
We had a fourteen foot high monkey puzzle tree in our back garden we didn’t want so advertised it for £60, buyer collects. What we didn’t say was that they’d have to dig it up. A young couple came along with a trailer and two shovels, one of which was bigger than her and she had to jump on it to dig. They got it out, including the root ball and we helped them carry it to the trailer. They were thrilled as they’d paid £30 for a little one which had died, and offered us £50 because they’d had to dig it up, and No, they would not fill in the hole. We weren’t worried about that as we had a load of rubbish to dispose of which fitted nicely!
Wat a great memory! They were happy, you were happy! Have you seen it in it’s new home?
No. We had just moved into the bugalow in Poole (1998) and we moved away on 2007. They weren’t local but pleased with their purchase and that’s what mattered.
Too funny, dear Keith! And that video…… 😂
I held regular Irish nights at my pub, and that was always the last song of the night our Seamus sang – albeit with slightly more lewd lyrics!
Arthur’s grandson’s comment about being quiet when opening the medicine cabinet was great. You don’t want to wake the sleeping pills.
I hope you bear it in mind Frank!
I knew a stop into the Baaamy Inn would clear out the day’s “dust”, Keith! And a bonus music vid to boot!
I’m pleased it had the desired effect, Denise!
Great puns, Keith
Plenty more to come yet! Thanks Sadje.
Looking forward for them every week
Heeheehee! It’s always a joy to visit the Baaamy. My Sweetie and Brother-in-Law are identical twins, and when they are being funny one will say, “Well, you’re ugly!” and the other will say, “Well, your mother’s ugly!”
Haha, that’s so funny!
Oh fab, and fab again… Great song too!
(I am quarter Irish… I wonder if it shows?)
Thanks, Chris. I have to ask- which part of you, left, right, top, bottom?
Defo on the left! 😂
Tell the Knitwits- that word is perfectly acceptable on my page if they ever feel like dropping by! heheheh
I’ll let them know, they’ll be delighted I’m sure!
Where do you get these lol. The Egyptian boy, the déjà vu of having forgotten something before and the jigsaw puzzle were the funniest to me.
I collect them, and put them in my pun pot until I can find a use for them! Thanks, Reelika
Good ‘un this week!
op.cit.
“one bloke told the doctor he was a bit puzzled because he’s having strange premonitions, Doc asked him when it started and he said, ‘next Tuesday’” (damn!)
and…and!
“my Nan thought she was doing a jigsaw puzzle of a chicken, I told to put the cornflakes back in the box – … – the crossword clue was ‘four letters, do something dishonestly’, I thought about Googling the answer but I didn’t want to cheat – I draw the line at join-the-dot puzzles”
total sb’d*
*smiled broadly
Chuffed to have amused you, kind sir!