‘
,
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It was like having four legs, one working, one out of use and two that did whatever they wanted to.
Crutches, can’t manage with them, can’t manage without them. It’s my own fault. I shouldn’t have tripped over the cat, grabbed the bookcase, then fallen down the stairs. Then tried to stand, tried to walk then tried to hop.
A mate managed to get me to the hospital. After sitting around for hours reading out of date magazines, drinking tasteless coffee and eying up the nurses, I eventually got seen.
Seemed I’d busted a bone. Why our bones have to be so brittle, goodness only knows. Have you ever tried breaking a chichen bone or a barbrcued rib? It’s impossible! So why do ours break so easily?
Where was I? Oh yes, I was handed some crutches, given a quick lesson on how to operate them then left to my own devices.
It was useless. I couldn’t tame them. It was like they had mischievous minds of their own, It’s suprising I didn’t have another accident and break another bone!
Anyway, things are improving, I only need one crutch now. Apart from getting it stuck in a grating yesterday, tripping somebody up this morning then dropping three pots of yoghurt on the supermarket floor after trying to balance them on one hand just now, I’m doing quite well!
‘Excuse me Miss, sorry about the mess….’
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Thanks to Jenne Gray and C.E.Ayr for hosting The Unicorn Challenge.
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© Ayr/Gray
I could never manage to use the crutches. I prefer the walker.
I did have to try once, it was disasterous! I’m with you!
Yup, very hard to manage.
Keith, this piece has such a great sense of humor! I love how you capture the frustration of crutches with such a light, witty touch. The ending made me chuckle—classic!
~David
Thanks for your kind words, David!
you always crack me up!
I try!
Ah, yes. Been there; done that. LOL.
It’s a common problem, I’m sure!
And I thought crutches were supposed to make it easier to get around! 😂
That’s the idea, however it’s easier said than done for some!
Couldn’t get on with crutches either after my dancing in the street. I was good at the three legged race at school though, so I should have been OK!
That’s good point, Di!
😀
Crutches are just no fun, not because I can’t use them, but because the reason you have to use them is not a happy one.
Fun story!
That is so true! However it’s a shame no one’s invented easier ones to use!
I would have to bet that if a pig or a chicken was as old as I am their bones would be brittle too!
You’re not old, Violet, you’ve just lived a long(ish) and interesting life!
Nevertheless, a 64 year old pig or chicken?
64? You’re a mere child!
What? You are a spring chicken compared to me – and him!
I’m trying to imagine you on crutches, me old limpy, and thinking that you’re already a bit of a disaster-in-waiting when you’re on two legs!
Fun as ever, tripod!
What a cheek, anyway, how did you know that?
Oh, and shame… but such fun!
…that’s the most important thing! Thanks, Chris.
Trying to get around on crutches is worse than the break. Funny take, Keith!
I’m expect they’ve caused further breaks too! Thanks, Brenda.
Needed crutches but once (fortunately) for such a simple appliance, they are remarkably counter-intuitive in certain situations, specifically: staircases!
damn… for an adult I was impressively ‘no fricken way in the order’
fun Six*
*for someone else lol
Perfectly put, they are indeed.
Fun to write, but not to experience!