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It was another evening at The Baaamy Inn and Farmer Fred was getting all philosophical about the drinks at the table, “your pint as perfect as a pint can be, your wine, crimson as a red rose, your whisky aged in barrels of oak, and this, my Guinness, it goes down as black as ink and comes out in a stream of pure gold which reminds me, I need to go to the toilet.”
Nickie over at the knitting circle was telling her fellow ‘woolruses’ how she bumped into someone she hadn’t seen since their schooldays; “I asked if she had a family, and she said she has a perfect son, I asked if he smoked and she said no, I asked if he drank and she said no, I asked if he he stayed out late and she said no, I asked how old he was and she said, four!”
Meanwhile, Ted was talking about the self-assembly cabinet he’s been been struggling to perfect, “it’s a bit wobbly at the moment but I’m slowly getting there, this morning I jokingly showed the missus some screws and said ‘look, the pointed bits are on the wrong end’, well, instead of laughing she said they were probably for fixing the back!”
I’m not sure if I’ve told you, but Arthur is getting married again, third time lucky he says, he’d been on a mature couples dating site and had a few meetups including one lady who was perfect, and liked everything around her to be perfect, Bab’s asked why it didn’t work out and he said it was because she wanted a man that was perfect, anyway he’s now got a fiance and he was asking George for help in compiling a list of songs to play at the wedding reception; “you’re the one that I want, another one bites the dust, I will survive, stuck in the middle with you, then when you want to head for your honeymoon suite for a bit of you-now-what, time to say goodbye – that was all Suzie at the next table needed to get her singing, “they don’t exist anymore, it’s time to say goodbye…” ; “Oy”, yelled Landlord Len, “not yet, you’ve still got time to buy another drink”.
“When I was in school” said Colin, “the teachers told me practice makes perfect, then they told me nobody’s perfect so I stopped practicing – a perfectionist is someone goes from point A to point A+ – my perfect job would be cleaning mirrors, I could see myself doing that – what’s the perfect S word? sword – I have a perfectly clean conscience because I’ve never used it……..!
It was a frosty night, and as songster George headed for his farmhouse he saw welcoming windows glowing in the distance and curls of smoke from the log fire wafting from the chimney and into the star-studded sky; he began to sing a song, “Show me the way to go home, I’m tired and I wanna go to bed, I had a little drink about an hour ago and it’s gone straight to my head……”
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Thanks to Denise aka GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence Stories where this week’s given word is perfect.
Keith's Ramblings 
You never fail to entertain with these, Keith. Baaarmy Inn and its characters are a keeper!
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Thanks, Dale, it’s the easiest write of the week for me, they just seem to come alive!
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And you bring them alive for me. I am presently reading The Pub P.I. by our former FF friend Michael Wynn… his characters could be inspired by your lot!!
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If I could find a bar filled with these kinds of people, I just might start drinking again. Always my pleasure to drop in for a visit.
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I’m sure your company would be welcomed!
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Excellent description of Guinness: “it goes down as black as ink and comes out in a stream of pure gold”
Also good point from Colin: “the teachers told me practice makes perfect, then they told me nobody’s perfect so I stopped practicing”
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Delighted to have amused you, Frank, thanks so much.
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Hilarious story Keith. Loved the song titles for the wedding…’Time to say Goodbye” may not be the best choice for a wedding song.. But who knows…
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Who indeed? Thanks, Suzette!
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You are most welcome Keith! Cheers.
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Fun as always Keith
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Thanks so much, Di!
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🙂
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Too funny, dear Keith. I never get tired of your adventures at the Baaamy Inn!
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Nor do I, Nancy, it’s like I’m back in my old pub again!
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Clean conscience! Too funny. Thanks for the fun time at the Baaamy.
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My pleasure, Mimi!
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A lovely six Keith.
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I’m pleased you liked it, Sadje, thank you.
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You’re welcome
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Ah yes, Guinness – lovely stuff. Can’t get it here (shame). But Super Six, Keith!
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I’m surprised! I even drank a pint in the world highest Guinness bar in Peru!
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Yay!!
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brought your A Game this week, I see/read
shouldn’t copy/paste seeing how it’s all up ^… lol but the Nickie and the Ted jokes did make me laugh (ol)
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Perfect score for use of the prompt word, Keith! Bonus we get to laugh all the way to the end.
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