Six!

Keith's Ramblings

/

‘

.

It was Halloween night at the Baaarmy Inn and Len had done a great job of decorating the bar; there were cobwebs the knitting ladies made, a couple of upturned brooms covered with tablecloths looking like ghosts, carved pumpkins on the bar … all in all, a great job and to complete the scene Len had whitened his face with flour and applied some of his late wife Maggie’s makeup, smudges of mascara beneath his eyes and lines of red lipstick running down  his chin. 

Even the farmers were impressed, a couple had got into the spirit of the occasion by attempting to look spooky themselves, Babs  was wearing a pointed hat and Bob had blood on his lip, although that was actually the result of an accident he had while shaving, Arthur had some false vampire teeth in his mouth; “wob woo woo wob woo wink?” he attempted to ask when it was his turn to buy the drinks, “wine, whiskey and weel-ale all wound!” quipped Colin!

The door swung open and in walked a guy looking like the Grim Reaper, he went from table to table handing out leaflets, left a few on the bar then walked out again; “who was that?”, asked Ted, “it says here that he’s a travel agent, see?” replied Fred, “he specialises in trips to dungeons, haunted houses and ghostly castles” – “if he visits Dracula, count me in!” joked Colin!

Specially for the occasion, Tracy from the knitting circle had made a pair of black gloves which had little pretend eyes stitched to knuckle parts, she was wearing them when she went to the bar to get a drink; barmaid Brenda hates Halloween and the slightest little things spooks her, she had her back turned as Tracy approached, so not wishing to frighten her by going ‘ahem’ or shouting ‘excuse me’, Tracy gently tippety-tapped  on the counter with her fingers – you should have heard the scream Brenda let out when she turned and saw what she saw!

Reg from the recruitment agency had joined the farmers and he was telling them about a ghost that applied for a job, “he said he had excellent ghoolifications, but he was lying, I saw right through him!”, he chuckled;  that was all Colin needed – “a ghost walked into a bar, we don’t serve spirits, said the bartender – I knew my girlfriend was a ghost the moment she walked through the door – ghosts keep in shape by exorcising – ghost love playing hide a shriek……..”.

Suddenly a strange creature appeared from behind the bar, it was dressed in a sack and wore a bright orange face mask which resembled a pumpkin, “look, Donald Trumpkin”, shouted Suzie from the next table; “OY” yelled the weird one, “we don’t talk about American politicians in my pub”, thereby revealing his true identity, he unfurled a paper scroll and began to read a poem – ”pumpkin, oh pumpkin, your candle light’s bright, pumpkin, oh pumpkin, you shine bright through the night…….”, everyone agreed that it was a bright night indeed!

.

Thanks to Denise at GirlieOnTheEdge for hosting Six Sentence stories where the given word is Agency.

 

23 thoughts on “Six!”

  1. Shweta's avatar Shweta Suresh Oct 31, 2024 / 16:25

    Haha. That was a fun read. Loved those ghost jokes. And Donald Trumpkin of course 😂

    Like

    Reply
  2. Misky's avatar Misky Oct 31, 2024 / 17:18

    This is the first time I’ve listened to you read one of your charming Sixes … a sound just like Michael Palin! Are you sure you’re not Michael Palin wearing a balmy mask? 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • Keith's Ramblings's avatar Keith's Ramblings Nov 1, 2024 / 12:39

      Thanks, Misky. I assure you, I’m not! I use different voices and accents depending on the story – who will I sound like next?

      Like

      Reply
  8. Frank Hubeny's avatar Frank Hubeny Nov 1, 2024 / 12:59

    I especially like these from Colin: “I knew my girlfriend was a ghost the moment she walked through the door – ghosts keep in shape by exorcising”

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  9. clark's avatar clark Nov 1, 2024 / 13:31

    fun seasonal Six, Sir. Sorry! Seems someone set some sound-rep sycle ….(phew! that last broke the….no! stop the sibilants! )

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  10. Chris Hall's avatar Chris Hall Nov 3, 2024 / 13:00

    Glorious! I particularly like the bit about ‘…he visits Dracula, count me in!’ and of course, it’s Colin😂

    Like

    Reply
  11. Liz H-H's avatar Liz H-H Nov 3, 2024 / 16:54

    Halloween punnage is just the right funnage.punnage. Next step is to smash some pumpkins?

    Like

    Reply

Leave a comment