For The Unicorn Challenge which is hosted by her and him, aka Jenne Gray and C.E.Ayr.
My Muse asked if she could pop home to see her parents, Mnemosyne and Zeus in Rome, Athens, or wherever it is they hang out. As she’s been quite helpful of late, I could hardly say no. And so, for the second time in as many days, I’m rerunning a piece. I wrote this five years, ten months and four days ago..
.
.
.
No kids, we’re not nearly there, now please let me concentrate.
Why do they drive on the wrong side of the road in France? Everyone should drive on the left like us. No, Jane, I won’t stop moaning. It was a stupid idea to bring the car on the ferry instead of flying. It’s supposed to be an ‘oliday. I should feel relaxed but look at me, I’m as tense as a tightrope.
I know Jane, it’s a roundabout. Here we go. Keep right, right, right – woo – bloody foreigner nearly bashed into me! Imbécile! Yes, Jane, I know I’m the foreigner ‘ere, but they should treat us with respect. We are their guests after all.
No kids, we’re not nearly there.
And you can stop telling me what to do Jane, or I’ll make you bloody drive.
That’s better.
Hey, you wait there chum, it’s my right of way. Oh, lordy lordy it’s not…eeeek..! Missed. Désolé monsieur.
No kids, we’re not nearly there.
Oh no, he’s heading straight towards us in the wrong lane! Regarde où vous allez! No, I’m wrong – hold tight kids – ooh ooh ooh – phew! Right, next time we drive abroad Jane, we’re hiring a tank!
No kids, we are not nearly there!
© Ayr/Gray
My fiancé and I nearly broke up trying to drive through Europe! I couldn’t wait to get home so I never had to talk to him again. We survived, though, and kissed and made up and the wedding went through as scheduled.
Haha, a happy ending to a stressful trip!
Fabulous, Keith! You had me laughing out loud at this poor bloke having to eat ‘umble pie after each error.
What a great one-sided conversation.
PS I hope your muse at least sends you a postcard!
Delighted to have amused you even without my muse! A postcard would be nice, I can’t remember when I last got one of those!
Haha! Perfect
…as is your response, thanks Sadje!
You’re most welcome
it can be a nightmare – well penned
Indeed! Toot toot!
Great story, Keith. You had me laughing out loud!
What more could I have hoped for! Thanks, Nancy
Magnifique, mon brave!
Funny, but sadly very close to the truth for a lot of folk who traverse La Manche!
…and vice versa, as I know living near the Transmanche ferry terminal!
Good one, Keith. Love the bits of French repartee. It is hilarious how you found a polite reason, to have your story’s character shout “Imbécile”..Lol!!
P.S. It was very kind of you to give your Muse some time off. Hopefully, she’s okay driving on the right.
I’m pleased you like it, Suzette. She may have a similar tale to tell when she gets back!
Lol…probably she might!
Hilarious, Keith, and so reminiscent of me driving in the US.
It’s bad enough in France, I’ll give the US a miss!
Heeheehee! It’s bad enough driving here, if i ever do go abroad again, i will not drive i don’t believe. And as for driving with children, well, that’s its own challenge.
I remember those days, a challenge indeed!
Sympathies to your character. I’m sure we’d have the same woes visiting England. Wanting to drive on the right, turning into the wrong lanes, etc. And then to do it with backseater whiners!!
Let me know if you ever do, I’ll keep well clear!
Deeply offended 😂
Oups, je suis vraiment désolé !
I always enjoy your funny and entertaining stories!! 🙂
I’m really pleased! Thanks M’lady
Rotaries (over here) are sometimes referred to as ‘anarchist intersections ‘.
Have never traveled far enough to be required to drive on the wrong side of the road.
Must be interesting.
They like to tout the improved safety from roundabouts, but I’m not buying it. The drivers scare me…not to mention the galloping unicorns! 🦄😂