A short story …

for Friday Fictioneers.


I’d had a bit of luck on the gee-gee’s so I thought I take the missus out for some posh nosh.

The waiter minced his way to our table, menus delicately held in a white-gloved hand.

‘Madam’, he said, ‘may I suggest our carpaccio of Maldivian long-line caught yellowfin tuna with a Japanese tamari and freshly foraged wild garlic glaze fanning an island of avocado creme fraiche, accompanied by our ambrosial thrice cooked Maris Piper Frites and an English country garden courgette flower beignet?’

‘Regrettably, for you sir we’re unable to provided those burger things, or pizzas’.

I should have stuck to McD’s!


Thanks to Rochelle for hosting and Dale for the photo.

Click on Mr and Mrs Froggie to join in the fun!

84 thoughts on “A short story …

  1. Sadje Sep 23, 2020 / 15:43

    Ah these posh restaurants! They don’t know good food.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Christine Goodnough Sep 23, 2020 / 18:22

    Note to self: when fine-dining in England, take a dictionary.
    Note to self #2: Avoid fine-dining restaurants. If they don’t sizzle you with the menu, they’ll skewer you on the profusion of cutlery. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Sep 24, 2020 / 11:59

      Haha! I’m slightly guilty of having used pretentious descriptions when I was a chef in an English gastro-pub, but not ones that required your M-W! Cheers Christine.

      Liked by 1 person

      • caleemichelle777 Nov 24, 2020 / 13:42

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        Liked by 1 person

  3. ceayr Sep 23, 2020 / 18:52

    ‘freshly foraged wild garlic glaze fanning an island of avocado creme fraiche’
    An utterly appetising piece, Keith, I’m off for some mince n tatties now.
    Bon app!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. rochellewisoff Sep 23, 2020 / 19:27

    Dear Keith,

    I realize McD’s is know across the globe but, seriously, it doesn’t exist in my world. Bring on the more elegant fare, please. Appetizing piece well served.



    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Sep 24, 2020 / 11:53

      Wherever I’ve been in the world I’ve always seen a McD’s! Definitely not for me either . Thanks Rochelle.

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Anita Sep 23, 2020 / 19:30

    The huge grand name of the recipe! They should give a sample to try first and then place order if one likes it 🙂 🙂
    Have a great week!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Michael Humphris Sep 23, 2020 / 19:59

    This plate of posh nosh would switch my gastric taste buds off. But then so does a Mac. Instead with a pen to hand and a another cup of coffee. I will carry on trying to build a master piece. Mash and sausage any one

    Liked by 2 people

  7. Iain Kelly Sep 23, 2020 / 20:29

    I’m somewhere between McDs and the posh nosh! Great fun, loved the description.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Dora Sep 23, 2020 / 21:01

    You mean, McD’s isn’t posh-nosh? Well, if they wrote their menu out in French, bet they could charge twice as much!😂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Dee | Grammy's Grid Sep 23, 2020 / 23:07

    Now you’ve went and made me hungry 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Sue Sep 24, 2020 / 03:30

    I have no idea what the waiter was rattling off, but it sounds decadent and expensive 🤗 Fun read!

    Liked by 1 person

  11. plaridel Sep 24, 2020 / 05:36

    he can look forward to dessert then if you know what i mean. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Dale Sep 24, 2020 / 13:51

    I’m one of those who is happy with burgers and pizzas but oh so appreciate fancy fare like your um.. posh tuna salad 😉
    This was deliciously fun, Keith!

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Nobbinmaug Sep 24, 2020 / 20:01

    There’s not much more embarrassing than not being as smart as a menu. I’ve been there. “What is…? Do you have a menu with pictures?”

    Liked by 1 person

  14. larry trasciatti Sep 24, 2020 / 20:22

    When it comes to food, I see, some people never get to visit the other side of the tracks. It’s a good thiing I’ve spent me entire lifetime listening to the Beatles, lest I couldn’t figure out what was a gee gee?

    Liked by 1 person

  15. pennygadd51 Sep 25, 2020 / 23:16

    Heehee! Sir should have taken a pin to stick in the menu and help him choose!
    I’ve had some excellent posh nosh, and when it’s good it’s unbelievably good.
    Your story is great fun, Keith!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. granonine Sep 26, 2020 / 02:04

    Hilarious, Keith :). I’d be willing to be that snooty waiter sneaks out to McD’s for his lunch break 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  17. draliman Sep 26, 2020 / 05:19

    Ha, as I was reading I was thinking, should have gone for burgers! If you can’t understand what the food is, don’t eat it, that’s my motto.

    Liked by 1 person

  18. James McEwan Sep 26, 2020 / 10:17

    The joy of posh nosh is the ability to admire the artistic floral plates or fine lines along the slates as you search for the chocolate dribble. Soup, well, forget it as it may as well be a sludge that smears the the porcelain (in and out).

    Liked by 1 person

  19. ahtdoucette Sep 26, 2020 / 14:30

    LOL at “burger things”. I’m totally with the guy here. Give me a burger, a bun and optional veggies/condiments and I’m good. That last phrase made me laugh out though. I could *hear* the waiter’s snooty tone. “Burger things or pizzas.”

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Sandra Sep 26, 2020 / 15:05

    Sounds like the waiter knows his clientele, for better or for worse.

    Liked by 1 person

  21. michaelwynnauthor Sep 28, 2020 / 12:27

    Keith, your description of the food had me salivating to the point I had to side with the waiter, food snob as he may be, you can keep your burger for another time, bring on the tuna.

    Liked by 1 person

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