A short story …

for Sue Vincent’s #writephoto Photo Prompt.



He never meant to be a burden,  but so it had been from his unwanted birth ‘til that day.

           So out he went into the darkness of a winter’s night …

His mother simply couldn’t cope, poor soul.  No fault of hers.  He knew she’d be better served without him.

            down the road, climbed a fence …

He’d reached out to touch her heart but in vain.

          crossed the field and entered the woods …

He hoped that by leaving his heavy load would be lifted from her shoulders.

          up a slope, over some rocks …

By the light of dawn, he’d be far away, in another place.

          along a narrowing track.

For the first time, he felt able to give her something. Her freedom.

          He watched the sunrise … 

He felt he’d failed.

          then lost his way.

She felt she’d failed.

          He disappeared.




26 thoughts on “A short story …

  1. Denise Hammond Jan 30, 2020 / 15:08

    It is not bad enough that I haven’t seen the sun in ages, but that is even more depressing. Cheer up Keith. I mean, even I can see the sun in the photo – at least I think I remember it.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Jan 30, 2020 / 15:22

      I thought it was about time I put my serious hat on! I’m told the sun’s still hing up there somewhere!


  2. Stine Writing Jan 30, 2020 / 15:28

    I love how you have the two stories intertwined. Where did he go? Why was he such a burden? Lol! When I read things I always want to know more!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Iain Kelly Jan 30, 2020 / 17:32

    The inter-cutting of the two perspectives works really well. Nice one Keith.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. willowdot21 Feb 2, 2020 / 17:08

    Two sides of a very sad story, a man who felt a burden on his mother and the mother who could not cope with parental responsibility. Why , and why did this spiral down to such tragedy.💜

    Liked by 1 person

    • Keith's Ramblings Feb 2, 2020 / 17:32

      I know not why, I’m only grateful this is not based on personal experience.


      • willowdot21 Feb 2, 2020 / 18:01

        Yes relationships can be so painful 💜


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