Ninety nine words

Keith's Ramblings

for Friday Fictioneers

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I lived in her shadow for too long.  She could do nothing wrong.  Admired, loved, applauded.  Little Miss Perfect.

Me?  Ignored, invisible.  Unwanted.

Then one day she disappeared.  Just like that.  I should be sad, she was my sister after all. 

Now things have changed.  Suddenly I’m needed.  After all, I’m all they have. 

At last, the sun is shining upon me.  The tree that cast the shadow, felled.

What happened to her?  Where did she go?  Nobody knows. 

Actually, that’s not entirely true.  One person knows.  The lumberjack knows.

And I’ll take my secret to the grave.

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brenda-cox-2Thanks to Rochelle for hosting and to Brenda Cox for the picture.

Click Froggie to join in the fun.

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68 thoughts on “Ninety nine words”

  3. Sandra Jun 23, 2021 / 14:42

    I wonder if the narrator will continue to enjoy his ‘place in the sun’.

    Liked by 1 person

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  5. pennygadd51 Jun 23, 2021 / 15:28

    Sinister! And shades of CE, with the staccato sentences and bloody conclusion. Good one, Keith!

    Liked by 1 person

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      • pennygadd51 Jun 24, 2021 / 10:46

        So am I. He was one of my ‘go to’ stories every week.

        Like

  6. granonine Jun 23, 2021 / 16:40

    Wow. Not the light-hearted story we’ve gotten from you lately. Well- told, dark emotions, atmospheric. Good one.

    Liked by 1 person

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  7. msjadeli Jun 23, 2021 / 18:15

    Keith, what a deliciously sinister tale. You really got into the head of your MC.

    Liked by 1 person

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  8. Dale Jun 23, 2021 / 18:37

    Muahahahaha! This will probably come to bite him in the arse…

    Liked by 1 person

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  9. rochellewisoff Jun 23, 2021 / 19:48

    Dear Keith,

    Is this a secret the narrator can live with? Dark and sinister tale. Well done.

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

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  10. Brenda's Thoughts Jun 23, 2021 / 20:57

    I wonder how long he will shine until the lumberjack returns. I really enjoyed the voice of this one. Well written, Keith!

    Liked by 1 person

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  12. Natasha Jun 24, 2021 / 08:33

    Gosh! I came back to read something easy-breezy your style and this took me by surprise. Good one, Keith.
    I’ll be writing one too this week.

    Have a good rest of the week.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  14. hilarymb Jun 24, 2021 / 10:31

    Hi Keith – that could so easily turn into a longer story … but briefly brilliantly told – gravely done … cheers Hilary

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Keith's Ramblings Jun 24, 2021 / 11:15

      The first draft was a lot longer. Getting a message across in a hundred words is quite a challenge! Thanks, Hilary.

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  15. GHLearner Jun 24, 2021 / 14:48

    Evil, evil fun, your story. And clever how you identify the lumberjack in the end.

    Liked by 1 person

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  16. Gail M Baugniet Jun 24, 2021 / 19:00

    Not easy to express that much emotion and drama in so few words, Keith. A good model for all writers.

    Liked by 1 person

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  17. Michael Jun 24, 2021 / 20:22

    An interesting change of tack,and well told.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  18. Dora Jun 24, 2021 / 20:25

    Keith,
    A sinister take on the prompt for sure. A tree and a sister felled in one day. Now she’ll live under the shadow of that grisly deed instead.
    pax,
    dora

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  19. XmasDolly aka Marie Jun 24, 2021 / 20:50

    Well, I have read the story & skimmed the comments. hmmmm Well, all I know you have helped one sister & brother get together! My hubby & his sister has been arguing for a few weeks now & I had them both read the story which lead to a phone call, a few apologies, a tear or two and a smooch! THANK YOU SO MUCH! It really kinda broke my heart to see them to argue so much, but I think that’s all over with now! THANKS AGAIN MY FRIEND! YOU’RE DUH BEST! HUGSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

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    • Keith's Ramblings Jun 25, 2021 / 13:50

      I’m delighted to have been of service in what was clearly a worrying situation. Thanks so much for your lovely comment. You’ve got me welling up now!

      Like

      Reply
  20. jenne49 Jun 24, 2021 / 21:12

    Seems to me she had it coming!
    Nicely dark, Keith.
    Why do people always make such a fuss of the perfect ones?
    Imperfection is so much more fun!
    Great story.

    Liked by 1 person

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    • Keith's Ramblings Jun 25, 2021 / 13:52

      I could not agree more! Life in the fast lane is so much better. Thanks so much Jenne.

      Like

      Reply
  21. Tannille Jun 25, 2021 / 08:49

    Thanks for reminding why it’s great to be an only child. Fantastic story. Channeled your inner CE!

    Liked by 1 person

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  24. Na'ama Yehuda Jun 25, 2021 / 15:30

    Oy vey! It is often the quiet ones who need watching …. Yikes! Well written, as per usual, my friend!

    Liked by 1 person

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  25. draliman Jun 26, 2021 / 05:21

    I like the analogy with the trees. A dark tale, but a cute chainsaw-wielding frog!

    Liked by 1 person

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  28. Nobbinmaug Jun 29, 2021 / 04:37

    I like the analogy of felling the tree that cast the shadow and the lumberjack. Nice, sinister story.

    Liked by 1 person

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