Today’s words :-
Timbertoe – someone with a wooden leg.
Tickle-pitcher – a thirsty boozer.
Tope – drink to excess
Trig- neat and smart
Tatterdemallion – a man with his clothes in tatters.
Tapster – a person who serves at a bar
Tocsin – an alarm bell or signal
They’re a funny lot in The Ramble Inn. A more diverse crowd you couldn’t imagine.
Take ‘One-line’ Will for instance. He never actually says hello, he just greets you with something like, “Where do wasps go to when they are ill? A waspital! Get it, get it?” Then he moves on!
He went up to Timbertoe Ted the other day.
“I met a bloke with a wooden leg called Smith” he said “I don’t know what his other leg’s called! Get it, get it?” Ted was not amused!
There’s Same-again Sam who’s a bit of a tickle-pitcher who tends to tope, Imogen the Immaculate who’s a right trig and Mean Maurice who’s skinny as a rake and dresses like a tatterdemallion despite being worth a fortune. The other day Will greeted him with, “a skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop. Get it, get it?”
A young lady called Rosey often pops in, you may just have heard of her! Knowing she worked at the local school Will said “If you add 568.5 to 764.8 then subtract 647.6 what do you get? A headache! Get it, get it?”
As for Misery Mike, he never smiles. Will has tried and tried but without success … until last night!
It was almost closing time so Buxom Betty the tapster rang the tocsin. Suddenly she yelled “Will, how dare you”, and slapped his cheek!
“That wiped the smile off his face” shouted Misery Mike breaking the silence, a smile creeping across his face. Then he laughed … Misery Mike actually laughed! So did everyone else.
Except for One-liner Will.
Whatever the joke was she obviously didn’t get it – but he did, well and truly!
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Keith's Ramblings 
Keith I love the way you can take these words and give them a character to show off the words. In this case multiple characters.
glad its tocsin and not toxin.
Cheers my friend
Searching
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Really pleased you enjoyed it, thanks so much. for dropping by.
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Sounds like a reality show! A sitcom one! Good stuff.
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Now that would be fun! Cheers Jade.
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Nice story. We need lighthearted stuff now.
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We do, hence my theme! Thanks Sadje.
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You’re welcome Keith
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It sounds like a place with “characters”, just like some from places i’ve known.
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I got the idea from the pub I used to run! Cheers, Mimi.
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Well told and rather realistic. I’ve even met a few like One-line Will: in public they’re jokers; alone they’re depressed.
A fondness for tickling the pitcher might be like a fondness for tickling the ivories? I’ve been reading Wodehouse again and picking up few new words; between you and Bertie my vocab will be enriched this month. 🙂
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You’re right, it’s often just a front. I love the Jeeves and Wooster books!
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Totally, thoroughly enjoyed. You are witty and fun to read. Plus all the additions to the personal dictionary are the cherries on the cake.
Though Will was a little mean today.
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Thanks so much, Sonia and thank you for your support.
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I have been reading your posts, Keith. A great craft to weave those words into a story. Lovely. Enjoyed this banter! Tickle pitcher is onomatopoeic.
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Thanks so much.
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Tatterdemallion is my favourite word from this story. Interesting characters and tremendously entertaining.
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It’s a great word! Cheers Suzy.
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Haha! One-liner Will had it coming. Great story, Keith. I was able to guess almost all of them today. 🙂
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Yea, well done!
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Hilarious! Very, very entertaining. Cheers Keith.
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Glad you like it Arti!
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I’m always amazed how you can mix those old words together, into a story 😉 Great job!
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I surprise myself sometimes! Cheers.
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Ha! Such fun. I almost thought Rosey would put Will in place but Mike did. 😀 Cool. Your collection of words is awesome, Keith.
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That’s really kind of you, thanks so much
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I like “tickle-pitcher.” It almost feels athletic.
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It does in a gentle way!
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Hahaha! Loved the different characters… so unique and fun. I actually love One-Liner Will. But he had it coming 😀
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I think you’re right! Thanks Shilpa
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More new words for me 🙂
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Best of luck finding uses for them! Thanks so much.
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Oh you are a crafty one with these words…had me tittering right off my toadstool….
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Haha! Nice one Kathe!
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HAH Let’s see what I can do with what you post tomorrow! Too much fun Keith!
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Timbertoe is one I think I will remember. Entertaining as always..
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I like it too, it’s really quite descriptive!
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Welcome to the League Of Bad Jokes. Battlers of the Booze. Champions of The Pour. Friend to every drink, no matter it’s source. this was funny
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Great comment Stu, thanks so much!
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My dad and his friends who were officers in the Indian Navy used to often refer to a certain fellow officer as a toper….. So I’ve heard this word for over 60 years now!
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Really? I’d never heard of it before finding it a few days ago whilst researching – much the same as most of the words I’ve used this month!
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One may say that he only had to be himself to make people laugh 😉
@JazzFeathers
The Old Shelter – Living the Twenties
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…and make them groan too sometimes!
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What on earth did Will say to Betty? I really wanna know!
Cheers,
CRD
https://scriptedinsanity.blogspot.com/
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Me too! I’ll try and find out!
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